You Mean… I’m Actually Supposed to Play Dodgeball?
By Jonathan Mckee on December 07 2011
In a youth ministry world where “dodgeball” has almost become a bad word, let me encourage you to play it anyway. Shoulder-to-shoulder time opens the door to face to face conversation. 
You see, dodgeball has received a bad rap in some circles because it isn’t “deep.” I often see comments emerge on youth ministry game web sites, “What does this do to further the kingdom?!” I assure you, don’t believe the hype. Dodgeball isn’t a sin. Point of fact; activities like dodgeball can open doors to meaningful conversation… when you actually play it!
That’s just it. When I say “play dodgeball,” I don’t mean just have “your teenagers” play while you say “Go” from the sidelines. I mean you actually play dodgeball with your teenagers.
Youth ministry needs less chaperones, fewer referees… and more adults that are willing to play shoulder-to-shoulder with teenagers.
Don’t take my word for it. Give it a try.
A few weeks ago I did… and I’m 41-years-old. The activity was dodgeball. I jumped in on the same team as the five junior high guys in my small group. When the whistle was blown I ran to the center, grabbing two of the red rubber balls. Tossing one to Jeffrey, one of my eighth graders, I said two words: “Get Ashley!”
Ashley is a cute 8th grader, Jeffrey’s friend… and my daughter. Jeffrey and I threw at the same time and pulverized Ashley. A quick high give, a smile, and we were on the search for more red rubber ammo to shoot at the enemy.
Pointless fun?
Hardly. This was bonding time. And it paid off. Twenty minutes later five boys and one very sweaty 41-year-old headed to our normal small group hideaway at the other end of our church. Within 5 minutes we were in deep conversation about Romans 12:2 and what it means to let Christ “change the way we think.” You’d be amazed how much junior highers actually pay attention to someone who pays attention to them.
Thank God for dodgeball!
If you want a kid to open up to you in small group time and speak honestly… try playing with them. The toss of a football, sharing a small cardboard tray of cheesy nachos at a football game, the ambush of a cute 8th grade girl with a dodgeball—these activities all open doors to connecting with kids.
That’s the thing. It doesn’t really matter what activity: dodgeball, worshipping to Chris Tomlin or playing X-box. Make the investment of time playing side by side and you’ll yield the results of conversation. Shoulder-to-shoulder opens doors to face-to face.
It’s not always easy to get today’s teens and tweens to open up to adults. The simple gift of “play” can open the doorways to conversation.
What are you waiting for? Pick up the phone. “Wanna go race Indy cars at Golfland?”
What about you?
Do you think “play” can open doors?
Why do games get such a bad rap?
What “shoulder to shoulder” activities have you used to connect with kids?
If you enjoyed this article from Jonathan McKee, you’ll love his book about relational ministry, Connect, Real Relationships in a World of Isolation.
Jonathan McKee, president of The Source for Youth Ministry, is the author of numerous books including Ministry By Teenagers, Connect, Real Relationships in a World of Isolation, and the award winning book Do They Run When They See You Coming? He speaks and trains at camps, conferences, and events across North America, and provides free resources for youth workers internationally on his website, TheSource4YM.com.
Comments
From Richard Jones on December 08, 2011
This is the best thing I’ve read about youth ministry in a long time! Profound? Maybe. Maybe not. But it is SO TRUE, and it reminds us of a truth that we occasionally forget.
From Jerry Major III on December 08, 2011
I guess the fact that we have to be reminded to play and interact with our teens is a statement about where youth ministry has gotten to.
From Jr. High Guy Dan on December 08, 2011
Can I hear an “AMEN”!!? This is what we have been teaching and tell my leaders, for years. The power of “play” has been lost among our students, that is why we do games and “encourage” everyone including leaders to “get off your seat and get on your feet”!
We have got to a point in our ministry this year where once a month we don’t have small group, we have the “Next Big Thing”. It is a everyone is included fun game or activity. What we have found by all of us as adults jumping in and participating too. The next week “double long small groups” go better!!
Thank Johnathan!
ps- I am going to pass this along to my leaders TODAY!
From Cherie on December 09, 2011
I’m a great fan of playing with the Youth. Ping pong, basketball, video games? Yes! Dodgeball? Not a huge fan. Maybe, I was on the receiving end too many times. Can’t put other kids through that.
From Jay on December 10, 2011
The power of play? Love it and have been doing it for years.
Dodgeball? Not a chance. Was victimized by it in gym. Classic case of the weak being stalked by the strong. Doesn’t teach any theological lesson I want taught and isn’t anything I want any where near my kids.
Come Jonathan! You and a junior high boy ganged up on your daughter and “pulverized” her? And this is a good thing?
Nope.
From Random on December 15, 2011
Really Jay?...
From Jay on December 15, 2011
Yes. Absolutely seriously.
Why?
From Philip Long on December 20, 2011
I think this was is a fantastic example of how we should get involved in youth’s lives. If you want to make an impact in a young person’s life (anyone for that matter), you’ve got to show them you care. We can’t just preach or coach students, we’ve got to somehow experience life together. I’ve had the best conversations with young people when we’ve had some sort of shared experience. The same principle goes for parenting.
